His Past Life
by Kisama-sama
Summary: Reid thought that portion of his life was over. That he would never have to tell anyone about that traumatizing event. But with their new case, it was impossible. The truth had to come out, and it was now, or never.
1. Chapter 1

_**I own nothing. Please R and R.**_

_A young Spencer Reid stared at his favorite book, now ripped to shreds on the floor. It wasn't that big of a deal. People did things like that to him all the time. But this…was slightly different. This wasn't just a random person with some hidden vendetta against him. This was Timothy, and Timothy never did anything like this to him before… Timothy was his only friend._

"_W-Why?"_

"_Because! I want to be exactly like you, but you won't let me! You wont tell me what's going on in your life! WHY! I just want to understand you! Me and you…were a pair! We are both so smart, so… So why wont you let me be your best friend! Let me be the one person who understands what you are going through!" '_No, you don't understand! It's not something you WANT to go through! I wouldn't wish it upon anyone, why are you asking something so…hard?'

"_It's not something you can simply understand just like that. It's my life."_

…

Reid sprung up in his bed, a cold sweat covering his face. It wasn't particularly a nightmare, but it was….traumatizing, in a way.

Sighing, Spencer sat up, forcing his stiff back to crack. He quickly hopped in the shower, shivering as the scalding water burned his back. He turned so the water was mostly on his chest, instead of his back, before starting to scrub at his hair. He felt a strange sensation of bugs crawling on him, of fingers gripping his hair, of things he didn't want to feel, or remember.

Stepping out of the not-so-relaxing shower, he threw on something he typically would wear, making sure to add a vest over top. Making sure his tie was straight, he grabbed his go bag, then walked out his front door. He blatantly ignored the heavy, dark feeling he was getting. It was a bit early for it, considering he hadn't seen the graphic case they had to work on yet. But that didn't matter. He always ignored those feelings, today wouldn't be any different.

Riding the bus wasn't the best idea he had that day, considering it was pouring, and the bus' closest stop to the BAU was about a 15 minute walk from the office. And he forgot an umbrella.

Sighing as he climbed off the bus, he pulled the collar of his coat up, bracing himself for the onslaught of the crystal droplets. It was times like this he was grateful for cutting his hair. It didn't tickle his neck, people couldn't make fun of him for it, and when it got wet, it didn't make him freeze once he was finally out of the rain. And it looked better. Well, according to Morgan and Prentiss it did. He still liked it better a bit longer. It reminded him of the good days, with his mother, and father. Before things took a turn…

Shaking his head, Reid sped up his pace; weary of the wet ground, but not wanting to be out in the cold much longer. When the BAU came into view, Reid pushed himself just a bit harder, catching himself just before he could fall, than grabbed the handle. He fought to keep a proud, goofy grin off his face as he opened the door. That simply wasn't him.

Trudging up to the elevator, he climbed in, ringing out his tie as he did so. The journey to his floor was short lived, but it was enough time for the dream to come back to him. Timothy… He missed Timothy. The _old_ Timothy.

The ding of the elevator made him jump, and he quickly walked out as the doors opened. Walking up to his desk, he placed his typical messenger bag down. He took his vest off, laying it down so it could drain of water.

"Hey, Pretty Boy, have a good journey?"

Reid forced a chuckle, muttering "I picked a bad day to ride the bus."

Morgan laughed whole heartedly, watching Reid shake like a wet dog. Prentiss walked out from the break room, setting down a cup of coffee and a bunch of sugar packets on Reid's desk. He gratefully dumped the sugar into the black liquid, ignoring the laughs from beside him.

"Here ya go." Prentiss handed Morgan his own cup before taking a sip of her own, her nose scrunching up at the foul taste. It wasn't good, but they all could use a pick me up.

"So, Reid, do anything fun over the break?"

"Nah, didn't get much sleep."

Morgan laughed, saying "Way to go kid! Get any digits?"

Reid sighed, playing right into Morgan's trap "Not like that and you know it."

Morgan ruffled Reid's hair, messing up the disorder atop his head. Before Prentiss or Morgan could rag on Spencer anymore, JJ appeared in the doorway.

"Sorry guys, weekends over, time to get back to work. We got a case, Hotch says briefing room in 5." She walked past them and headed toward Garcia's lair.

Reid let out a heavy sigh, pretending it was from relief instead of it being weighed down by the anxiety of his dreams over the last few days. He didn't know why it was all catching up with him, its not like Timothy ever did anything too drastic…right?

…

"Billy Grant, age 19, was killed by a blunt force object. Right now he is the sole victim, and the LVPD doesn't want to wait for another."

As JJ continued the briefing, Reid felt something oddly familiar about this. Age 19, killed with what seems to possibly be a hammer…. Oh…that's why.

"Reid…Reid! REID!"

Spencer jumped, flinching slightly at the gruff voice his boss used.

"U-Um, yes?" He felt the eyes of his teammates on him, but he couldn't look any of them in the eye. Instead, he focused on Hotch's tie, ignoring the blatant staring.

"I asked if you thought you could work out a geographic profile despite there being only one dump site."

"Oh, well yes. We have the area he was taken in, where he was dumped, and from that we can ask around and see where he hung out. From that I should be able-," "Ok, ok, Reid, we get it. Get started as soon as possible. Everyone, be on the jet within half an hour." As soon as he finished speaking, everyone stood and proceeded to their own individual tasks.

Reid remained in his seat, a horror stricken mess. There was no way. It wasn't possible, he knew it. Clearly, it had been so long in the past, and times had changed. But then….why was it so similar? It had to just be a coincidence. The logical part of his brain agreed readily with that. But it didn't matter. His heart, and the other part of his brain, told him otherwise. There was something fishy about this. And it was his job to find out what.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Wow, an update this soon….I'm shocked with myself. I really hope you guys are intrigued and that the characters aren't too OOC….**_

_**I own nothing.**_

Riding in the jet was horrible. Not only did he have to be in close proximity to some of the best profilers out there, but he also had to look over the crime scene photo's, which only reminded him of the issue at hand even more.

"So, Reid, excited to be heading back home?" Reid bit his lip and stared at the crime scene before him, lost in thought.

"Reid?" A hand was placed on his shoulder, and he flinched. His head jerked to the side, his eyes meeting JJ's concerned ones.

"Um, not particularly. Benington said mom isn't up to visitors, and I doubt we will have any free time to visit anywhere else, so it's basically fruitless to be any form of excited over another person who lost their life. And besides-," "So, make any progress on the geographical profile yet?"

Reid sighed, realizing the question was simply to stop his ramble. And yet, he still provided an answer.

"I've marked down where the body was found, and where he was last seen. It's only about a ten mile radius, so once I get more information on where he was likely to be found I should be able to narrow it down quite easily." He didn't go off on a ramble, he didn't spout facts; he hardly even looked at any of his fellow work mates.

They seemed to get the fact that something was bothering him, for no one bothered him the rest of the flight. It wasn't his fault he had some…_issues _that were on his mind.

….

Staring down at the body in the morgue was one of the worst possible things for him at that moment. No, not because he was squeamish, not because he couldn't keep his mind on the case. His mind was on the case more then it should be; all because of the body lying on the metal slate in front of him.

It looked exactly like…._him_.

"It appears from the rough abrasions that the object used was something like a hammer or even a bat." Reid would have rubbed it in Morgan's face that he was right, at least in his mind, but today was different. This case was different.

"Was there anything…strange found during the autopsy?" Reid couldn't fight the question off, even though he knew Morgan would ask him about it later.

"I didn't think it strange at first, but now that you mention it, yes. There was a small key found in his stomach. I didn't think it was strange because we found handcuffs near the body, and suspect he was forced to swallow the key before he died." Reid felt his world spin, a deep horror striking him. He hardly remembered anything that happened as he stumbled his way out of the room. He walked out of the building, leaning against the wall beside the door.

He felt sick.

He bent over, one hand over his stomach while the other braced himself against the wall. He bit his tongue, knowing if he forced it down it would help keep him from puking, but it was worthless.

One second later, his dinner from the night before, and his coffee, was all over the sidewalk.

He used both hands to brace himself, feeling all strength leave his body. This wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening. It couldn't just be a coincidence. But it had to be. It wasn't possible for someone to know, for someone to….was it?

No, it wasn't.

The doors popped open and Morgan came rushing out, a concerned look on his face. He turned and saw Reid, his eyes only taking about 20 seconds to take in the site before him. Five seconds later, Reid had an extra jacket around his shoulders, and was being steered away from his own bodily fluids. It felt like an out of body experience, and he couldn't bring himself to answer any of Derek's questions.

…

The ride home was silent, despite a few attempts at conversation. Reid simply wasn't in the mood, for once. Not even when Morgan tried to get him to talk about Doctor Who, or Star Trek. He didn't want to talk. Not with his mind in turmoil.

But this wasn't the storm. He had past the calm of the storm, but he wasn't through the brunt of it yet. Not by a long shot. This was just the beginning.

….

Morgan and Reid finally arrived at the LVPD, just in time to meet the rest of the team. They set up the map for Reid to keep working on the geographical profile now that Prentiss and Rossi had gathered more information for him; while they were at…the morgue….

Reid shook his head slightly, his eyes closing. After a few moments of clearing his mind, his eyes opened again, just in time to see a man walk into the room.

A man, he hates to say, he recognized.

"Reid? Oh my god, it is you! It's been what, like, almost 20 years?"

….

_**Wow, okay. Didn't expect to write this all in one day. Or this soon. Or this short. But hey, I didn't want it to move TOO too fast, so here we go. I'm proud of myself, for once. Welp, that's it guys….please review! If you think its worth it…**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Omg ok, you guys are amazing. SOO many reviews! I'm simply astounded! Thanks SOOO much! I'll try and get the next chapter up soon, so look out! **

**I own nothing.**

…**.**

Recap: _**After a few moments of clearing his mind, his eyes opened again, just in time to see a man walk into the room.**_

_**A man, he hates to say, he recognized.**_

_**"Reid? Oh my god, it is you! It's been what, like, almost 20 years?"**_

…

'_This can't be happening; this can't be happening….This can't be happening!'_

"Reid, you know Sam?"

Reid could feel the world spinning around him, but there was nothing he could do to stop it. He could see the confusion and curiosity on his workmates faces, he could see a man he was hoping and praying he wouldn't see….and he couldn't handle it.

He felt like he was going to be sick again.

He started to turn his body to run, but Hotch placed a hand on his shoulder, preventing him. He glanced at his face, than turned toward the ground. He wasn't such a coward that he would run, was he?

"Uh, yeah, I know him." Sam blinked at him, seeming to catch on that he didn't want any details on how they knew each other given.

There was one thing that stood out though.

"Is he working on the case with us?" He looked from one face to the next, hoping for an answer, but the person who finally responded didn't sound too happy. Sam.

"Of course, why else would I be here? Now let's get to work. I want to help you with the geographical profile." '_Of course he does. Because then he can corner me and force bad memories to resurface…not that they haven't already._'

Hotch gave Spencer a pointed look, leaving no arguments. Reid sighed and pursed his lips slightly, turning and heading toward his map.

"Go ahead; feel free to tell him where his main "hang out" joints were." Sam nodded to Hotch, and then walked toward Reid.

His back tensed when Sam came close, and he dreaded being alone with this man. He wasn't scared of _him,_ but he was scared about what could be brought up between the two. After all, he hadn't seen him since….then.

….

His worst nightmare came true, as within an hour or two, the team was called away. They were going to the same places he was marking on his map, to question his friends, no doubt. And he wasn't allowed to leave. He had no reason to.

"So, now that they are gone, mind telling me why you don't want to be near me? As far as I'm concerned, I did you a favor back in the day. I never did anything bad to you." Immediately, the pain lessened a bit, and was replaced with guilt.

"I'm sorry! You're right, you didn't do anything wrong. You helped me, and I am very grateful for that. It's just…my team doesn't know. About anything. And I really would like to keep it that way, though with this case…." Sam placed a hand on his shoulder, ignoring the slight tremor it caused. It was meant to be comforting, and after a few moments of understanding silence, it was.

"Spencer, I know this must be hard for you. I can't even imagine. But listen to me carefully, son. It's not good to let it all build up. Talk to someone about it, someone other then me. _Tell_ someone about it. They can comfort you, help you through this case. Believe me, it's a great relief." Okay, definitely not what he had been expecting. This man was…kinder, then he had seemed in the past. Then again, to a 12 year old, any hint of contempt or anger, even not directed at him, was a rather scary thing…

"Y-You really think I should…t-talk to someone about it?" Sam's eyes softened, and he gave a small, firm nod. Spencer took a deep, shaky breath, before nodding. He could do this. But…

Who to talk to?

Hotch was out of the question. He wouldn't judge, that was for sure, but he would probably have to report it to Strauss… Plus every time Reid saw him after that, he would think about it.

Prentiss was a slightly better choice, but…. Let's face it; she would probably end up telling Hotch. Either that or she would spill it while high on alcohol. He trusted Prentiss with his life, and honestly he would tell her if he had no one else. He knew she wouldn't tell Hotch unless it was necessary, but he felt there was still a better choice.

JJ and Garcia were closer to what he needed, but they would coddle him too much. He didn't want whoever he told to break down and pity him and think of it every time he told them. But he also didn't want them to just dismiss it and pretend it never happened….

That left Rossi and Morgan. Rossi wasn't even in the question to begin with. He still got a strange feeling from him, even if he respected him and admired his books.

Morgan, on the other hand…

Morgan wouldn't judge. Morgan wouldn't betray his trust, not like before. Morgan had past experience, and knew what it felt like to finally be relieved of that…weight. Morgan…Morgan could help. He would listen, comfort, be there for him, but not demean him… Which was exactly what he needed.

So, Morgan, then. That should be easy, considering they were splitting in two's for their hotel rooms.

"Yeah, maybe I will. T-Thanks Sam." A small smile broke out on Sam's face, and he nodded once more reassuringly. With that, his hand was removed and he turned back to the board, explaining and pointing on the board where a few of the dead man's favorite restaurants were.

Reid followed him without really listening, still lost in thought. He was really going to…tell Morgan, about _that_? He had to. He couldn't go through this case alone, without having a single person he was close to who knew….

….

_**Sorry guys. It's really short. BUT! I plan on working on the next chapter ASAP, so it might be up a bit sooner then normal….if its not up today, or tomorrow, expect it Monday. No guarantees, but I'm gunna try. Really hope you guys are anxious to see where this leads….I know I am lol. Sam is actually a good guy, surprisingly, huh? Lol. Well, Thanks to any reader/reviewers, and please look out for the next chapter! **_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Thanks for all the amazing reviews! I'm surprised how many reviews I've gotten so far…thanks so much you guys! Next chapter should be up anytime from today to Wednesday, but no promises.**_

_**I own nothing. **_

Reid let out a heavy sigh. Of course. It figures they wouldn't have to double up the one time he really wanted them to. And really, Morgan had to be placed as far away as possible?

They really weren't making this easy on him.

Reid sighed as he fell back on his bed, a thick novel in his hands. Maybe if he relaxed enough, it would slip his mind and he could forget about it. Then he wouldn't have to tell anyone about it, and life could go on.

But with an eidetic memory, that was kind of impossible. Deciding to lose himself in his book and worry about talking to Morgan later, Reid settled under his covers in nothing but his pajama bottoms. Normally he always wore a shirt, even to bed, but this was different. He was hot. Very hot.

He didn't know if it was the case catching up with him, or simply the hotel room was warm, but he had a light sheen of sweat covering his body, and he still felt warm. He threw the blankets off of himself within seconds, and his book went flying with it. He sighed in frustration; couldn't anything go right?

He got up and bent over to retrieve his book, just as a light knock echoed off his door. He jumped, his book dropping to the floor once again. He glared at it, but left it where it was. Stupid, evil book.

Turning, he walked to his door and opened it, tilting his head slightly back when he felt a nice cool breeze. His eyes took in the dark skinned man in front of him, and his heart beat a bit faster.

This was his chance. If he wanted to tell Morgan about it, now would be the perfect time. But then…why was Morgan here?

"Morgan?" A small squeak of his name was all Reid could force out. Suddenly he felt cold, goose bumps breaking out across his stomach as his nipples budded. He blushed slightly as he realized he had answered the door without a shirt. Normally he wouldn't have cared, but this is Morgan, Mr. Buff. And here he was some scrawny lil thing….

"Um, Reid? Can I come in?" Realizing he was just standing there, freezing cold, with the man he wanted to talk to standing on the outside of his door….. Safe to say, he felt a bit dumb. And someone with an IQ of 187 shouldn't feel dumb.

"Reid?" Sighing at himself, Reid opened the door, letting his unexpected guest in. He walked over to his go bag and pulled out a nice and loose shirt, one he has had for years.

"Whoa, Reid, never pegged you as the type to like that kind of music." Reid glanced down at the bottom of his shirt, in which the word "Attila" was written. Reid felt more heat rise to his cheeks, and he quickly gripped the bottom of his shirt, yanking it over his head.

"A friend bought it for me. They're a bit harder then my normal type, though I do like a song or two by them." He searched for a different shirt, digging through his bag quickly. Why did he have to grab that shirt, out of them all? Sighing, he pulled a plain grey T-shirt out and yanked it on, hurrying to cover his body.

"A_ bit _harder? Reid, what do you normally listen to? I thought you only ever listened to and enjoyed Mozart and stuff…" Reid sighed; he understood why they thought that, but that didn't mean that was _all_ he listened to. Talk about annoying.

"Just forget about it Morgan. Why are you here?" Morgan chuckled light heartedly, but as soon as it faded, a new seriousness hung in the air.

"I came to check up on you, Kid. You've been acting weird all day, and I'm worried about you." Spencer sighed. He knew this was coming. But then…this was his chance, wasn't it? If he wanted to talk to him about it, now was the perfect time.

"Y-Yeah, I know. Sorry about what happened at the morgue, by the way." Despite wanting to tell him, his words were hardly coming out. He knew the terms to describe as to why he was feeling closed throated, but it didn't calm him to think about it. So he recited the periodic table in his head.

It did its job, his nerves settling in the background, but there was only one problem. Morgan fell to the background too, and he couldn't understand a word coming from his mouth.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" He felt bad, but he couldn't help it. If Morgan wanted him to talk, he needed to relax as much as he could before hand.

He received an exasperated look, but Morgan started over once again "I said, what's up with you Pretty Boy? What is it about this case that's bothering you? Or is it that…. Reid, did Benington say something?" Reid's head lifted up, but he couldn't feel the anger he expected. It was a reasonable explanation, for the most part. It would explain everything other then…the distribution of his previous meals by the morgue.

If he wanted to lie, that was the perfect excuse. No one would ever know the difference….But he couldn't.

"No, Morgan, Benington didn't say anything, aside from that Mom's not up to visitors. That's not what's been bothering me."

Morgan walked over, placing a hand on his shoulder. He put a bit of pressure on it, urging him to sit down without really forcing him. Reid sat down happily, his knees feeling weak simply from the thought of telling him…

"Then what is it, Kid? You've got us all worried." Spencer let out another heavy sigh.

"You can't tell a single soul about this. Promise?" Morgan raised an eyebrow, and Reid was sure his thoughts were somewhere along '_What are we, in kindergarten'_ but he didn't care. This was important to him, and if he was going to tell anyone, they had to swear not to tell anyone.

"I promise Reid, and you know I'm good on it. I'm _not_ going to compromise you're trust." Reid sighed slightly, feeling a bit guilty that Morgan still remembered how angry he had been that one time…

"I know Morgan. I trust you. Which is why I want to tell you, about….about what happened when, w-when I was young…" He bit his lip, and Morgan could tell this would take a lot out of both of them.

"It's okay Reid, you can tell me." Reid closed his eyes and took a deep breath. '_You can do this Spencer Reid, you can do this. This man is like your big brother, you know you trust him…. I know I can, but I _don't_ know if I can get the actual story out…_'

"I-I know…. Morgan, you know my childhood wasn't all sunshine and roses" Morgan made an incredulous face, but Reid ignored it. "Despite all that you know, it does get worse. When I was about 12-," he was cut off by a loud ringing, making both of them jump.

Morgan reached into his pocket, yanking out his phone. He brought it to his ear and answered it, saying short, quick responses, until he finally hung up.

"Sorry Kid, looks like we got another body. Hotch said this one looks more like an accident, but that's just going by the photos. He wants us at the cars in 5." With that, he ruffled Reid's hair, and then walked out the door.

Reid could tell he was trying to take it easy on him, to not stress him out more then needed, but it didn't matter.

Despite anyone and everyone's efforts, there was only one person he could think of that would make him feel better.

Timmy….

….

_**Yes, I'm ending it there. This must be really confusing, huh? Don't worry, IIII know what's going on, so just hang in there haha. You guys are amazing me with your reviews, and it really makes me want to update sooner….therefore, I am going to start on the next chapter at about this moment. It's most likely not going to give too much away, but you will learn more…and we might happen to meet an old friend soon….but you didn't hear it from me. **_

_**K one thing, there will be absolutely NO slash in this story. For those who read the old A/N from the last chapter, just ignore it. Please do not stop reading this story because you thought it might have slash in it, because it honestly doesn't. If there is any romance, it would be purely OC's anyway. Which it won't be, so yeah. **_

_**Anywho, please review! Hah, that rhymed….sorry, I'm weird lol. Cya next chapter!**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Oh my gosh…30 reviews guys? YOU ROCK! Might not sound like a lot, but for me it is. Best I ever got (on my last account name, stories no longer exist) was almost…60 I think, and that was for a longer story. So I'm really happy for this! Thanks sooo much you guys! Sorry I don't respond in PM, I would but I really don't have the time.**_

_**I just want to thank any/all readers, reviewers, and alerters :D**_

_**I own nothing.**_

….Of course, that wasn't a good idea. Timmy was long gone. After all, he hadn't talked to him in 18 years, 4 months, 8 days, 13 hours and….24 seconds. Closing his eyes, Reid pressed the bottom of his palm to them, clenching them tightly. Why couldn't something be normal, and go well, for once in his life?

Standing up, he changed his pants quickly, grabbed his gun and badge, and then ran out the door. A minute later, he ran back in, grabbed a jacket, and then ran back out once again. Checking his clock as he ran down the steps, he realized he had about….38 seconds to get to the cars.

Speeding up his pace a bit, he stumbled down a few steps, and then continued on, ignoring the few people staring at him. He stopped outside one of the cars, giving a small little wave at Hotch and Rossi in the front seat. The doors unlocked, and he slid into the backseat, alongside JJ.

Once the cars started pulling away, Reid winced, reaching down to rub his knee absentmindedly. He stared out the window, lost in thought.

"Hey Spence, is everything okay?" He turned toward JJ, the only person to ever call him Spence, with a confused look on his face. He knew she wouldn't be one to ask him about why he was acting so weird, at least not yet. She probably talked Morgan into talking with him, so it wasn't about that.

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?"

"You've been rubbing your knee for the last few minutes, and winced a few times…" Looking down, he realized it was indeed, true. His hand was on his knee, rubbing soft circles, and as he pushed down a bit harder, he scrunched his face up in pain.

Letting out a quite groan, he reached down and pulled his pant leg up, sliding it past his knee carefully. He could see JJ flinch out of the corner of his eye when she took notice of the large bruise already covering his knee. Great, just what he needed.

"What on earth did you do?" Reid sighed, pulling his pant leg back down. He didn't want to talk about it. Stupid wound….

"So, Morgan mentioned this body looking more like an accident. Do you think it was the same unsub getting sloppy, or someone new entirely?" Hotch looked at him from the rearview mirror, a contemplative look on his face.

"The LVPD wouldn't tell us about the body unless it was relevant to the case. Besides, I get the feeling there is something they aren't telling us yet. I'm going to find out what that is when we get to the crime scene."

…

Reid stared down at the mangled stomach of the man in front of him, hardly finding it in himself to move to the side so he didn't step in any blood. A bitter, dark feeling swelled in his stomach, and he felt like he was going to be sick.

Oh no, not again.

Reid turned away, swallowing deeply, his eyes sliding closed.

This wasn't possible. It simply wasn't possible! How could….no. This wasn't happening. It had to be a nightmare….

"Reid, are you okay?" Spencer turned, jumping slightly at his name. Rossi stared back at him, and the stiff feeling in his back didn't fade.

"U-Um, I-I'm fine! Just uh- tired! It's really late, and we had a long day…" He knew it was a weak argument, and he hadn't even showed an ounce of truth to back up his words. Rossi was one of the best profilers. He was done for.

"Yeah, it is kind of late, isn't it? Don't worry kid, we can head back once were done looking this over." '_Don't call me kid, you…you….wait, did he just ignore my obvious lying and walk away?'_

Reid stared openly as Rossi walked a bit away and examined a few bloody footprints. '_They knew…_

_No, they know nothing. They assume they know something. They know something is up, and what, are giving me space? That's…nice I guess. It _is_ nice of them, but if Morgan backs off, I won't be able to tell anyone about…it….' _Spencer let out a heavy sigh, thankful his stomach didn't feel like emptying itself at the moment.

He took one glance at the dead body beside him, and the feeling was back.

He held his stomach and turned away, focusing on what Hotch was talking about with an officer a few feet away.

"Hey Reid! Can you come over here for a second?" Turning his head, Reid looked at Rossi, an eyebrow raised. Why did Rossi need him? He could calculate the approximant height and weight of the criminal from the footprint, but Rossi could easily do that himself…

He walked over to Rossi, giving him a questioning look. He kept his mouth shut, not trusting himself not to let his stomach contents out quite yet. However, not much could stop him when he took in what Rossi had been looking at.

A bloody boot print.

In the exact same size, and shape as his.

Quickly calculating it in his head, he realized another horrible truth.

He was about the right height and weight to leave that foot print, as well.

….

_**Ok, omg. I'm soooo sorry this took so long! It would've been out sooner, but I had a HUGE project I hadn't even started on, and to make a long story short, I had a lot to do in a little bit of time. And because of that, I didn't get to write much.**_

_**One thing, when Hotch said something about the body, I had something planned. And I forget what. So that might come into play later, if I can remember, but if not, oh well. **_

_**Hope you liked it, please review!**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**I own nothing.**_

This just wasn't possible! It was like….like fate was out to get him. But he knew that was preposterous. Some things may happen for a reason, but there was no such thing as "fate".

But then…why was all this happening? It was all so similar, so familiar…

"Reid?" His head shot in Rossi's direction, his eyes wide in what appeared to be shock and horror.

"Reid…are you alright?" Spencer felt a building panic, his eyes fluttering around the area quickly. He knew he wasn't alright. This was just too much. It was too similar, there is no way it was just a coincidence….

"T-There, Hotch, to y-your left….Do you s-see anything?" Dang it, the stuttering was back.

Hotch looked around, judging by the look on Reid's face that he should play along, if only for the moment. He pretended to look to the side, his eyes scanning quickly. Nothing stood out, and he turned back to Reid, about to report his findings.

However, just as he turned, a glint caught his eye. His head snapped back in the direction, his eyes searching out the object immediately. It was hidden beneath newspapers for the most part, but a small bit was sticking out. A…chain?

Picking it up, he raised an eyebrow when a golden pocket watch was uncovered. Looking back at Reid, he noticed one thing. The kid looked far sicker and horror struck then before.

Spencer held his stomach, eyes wide. There simply was no way. But…

He turned away, his eyes clenching shut. He wanted to run. But he couldn't. He would probably step on and destroy something valuable to the investigation. Opening his eyes, he found an escape route and made his way towards it, rushing back past the cars.

He heard muttering behind him, be he didn't stop. If he did, he was going to be sick. Again….

He jumped and bit back a scream when he felt a hand grab his shoulder. He turned, ready to knee them if needed, but the feeling faded as soon as it had come.

"Kid, what's going on with you? Never mind, don't answer that. Not here. Come on, let's go back to the hotel and talk this over, okay?" Reid felt himself nod, but he didn't remember doing the gesture.

The whole drive back to the hotel was a blur. Spencer's hands were shaking, and it took all his strength not to jump out of the car and puke right there. If things kept going this way, they would be taken off the case….

When they finally entered Reid's room, Spencer felt like he was going to collapse. Before he did, however, he made a run for the bathroom. He tried slamming the door shut behind him, but Morgan caught it with his arm, a strong look of concern on his face.

Reid simply ignored him, kneeling in front of the toilet. Morgan let out a deep sigh and reached forward, rubbing soft circles into his back.

"It'll be okay, Pretty Boy. Just tell me what's going on." Reid wiped his mouth, standing to wash it out. After he finished drying his face, he turned to face Derek.

"Morgan…if I tell you this, you have to _swear_ not to tell anyone! They are bound to find out sooner or later anyway…" Morgan winced, knowing exactly what Reid was talking about. It had been for his own good!

"I swear Reid. Now please just tell me. Its doing you no good to just stand around and pretend nothing is going on." Reid swallowed and made his way out of the bathroom, taking deep breaths as he did so. He sat on his bed, deep, shaky breaths the only sound in the room.

In a moment, Morgan was sitting next to him, and he suddenly had the urge to spill everything. Morgan was right, it would help. And if Morgan knew, he would have someone to talk to about it from now on…. Plus, Morgan knew how hard it was to go through something like that….

"Morgan, this isn't easy for me to say, so please don't interrupt. I'll try to get out as much as I can…" He received a nod, and another intake of breath was all he needed.

"Morgan…I know this case. And I don't mean in a "I know who the killer is" type way. I mean, I _know_ this case. As in…I was involved in it. Not _this_ case…but…" He took a deep breath, preparing himself for this. Once it was said, he would be acknowledging it…

"Morgan….When I was little…I was kidnapped."

…

_**OK wow….I'm sorry. This one is short. Like, really short. BUT! You are going to learn even more in the next chapter! Not all of it, but some of it hehe. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter…. **_

_**Anywho, keep up with the amazing reviews, you guys seriously inspire this story :D**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**I'm sooooo sorry for taking so long. A bit of writers block, a lot of distractions…. Just like most writers I suppose, hmm? Please don't be mad at me… *rubs neck awkwardly***_

_**Anyway, you guys seriously amaze me with your reviews. 50 already? Wow…. Keep it up, its seriously what keeps this story going (quicker anyway.) Oh, and keep in mind, the last two chapters were the same day, so Morgan talked with him about it all in the same day. Actually, this chapter too I guess…haha.**_

_**I don't own anything.**_

Morgan stared in shock, a painful feeling bubbling in his stomach. Clearly this story didn't go happily, and he wasn't sure he could hear this…. But he had to. This was his best friend, and right now, his best friend needed a listening ear.

"Reid…."

"Please, Morgan, let me fini-," he was cut off by a harsh knock on the door. The heavy sound seemed to echo around the room, making a heavy silence pass between the two agents.

After a moment, the knocking stopped, and Morgan stood up. He sauntered over to the door, peeking through the peephole. Not recognizing the man before him, he opened the door, a question hanging on the edge of his lips. It never came out, however, for before either man could utter a word, a loud, slightly horrified gasp fell out behind them.

Turning around, Morgan saw his team mate sitting on the edge of the bed, his face scrunched up in so many different emotions….

"T-Ti….Timmy?"

….

Sam stared down in shock at a golden pocket watch. If he didn't know any better….

It seemed it was impossible to get it open, or so the BAU team has said. Said they had tried everything except breaking it to pieces.

But….

They don't know about…..now do they?

Leaning closer, he scanned the edge slowly, making sure he didn't miss a single section of the cold in front of him. There, just behind where the chain met the watch, was a small button.

Just like before, huh?

Wait…..just like before…..

"That's it! This couldn't be possible unless someone knew this case!" Talking to himself was just who he was, but he felt like he was playing both sides of a conversation. Of _course_ they had to know the case from the past, that was the only way they could be doing things the exact same way.

But then….

**Wait a second!**

No one ever published anything about the watch! That was kept from the press! That means….someone was taking notes and spying on them? For 20 years?

But…there was no other explanation. _No one_ knew about the watch, other then his team, who would never spill a word about it, and Spencer.

Spencer….

He didn't tell anyone, did he?

...

He'd just have to find out.

…

"Spence! It's been forever man! How have you been?" Morgan didn't trust this man one bit. There was a fake happiness to his voice, and it only raised his suspicion.

"T-Tim…. Uh, y-yeah, it's been awhile… I've been better…" Reid seemed to calm down, most of the emotions no longer showing on his face. However, he still seemed shocked. And how on earth did he know this man anyway?

"Um, excuse me, but who are you?" He didn't mean to sound rude, but he would admit to himself, he was overprotective. And Reid had a knack for getting in trouble, so it applied even more so for him.

"Aww, little Spency never mentioned me before? It's no big deal, I suppose. I was only his best friend growing up." There was a bitterness in his tone neither Morgan nor Reid could ignore.

"Morgan, this is Timothy Hains. We grew up together for awhile…" Morgan could tell there was something he wasn't saying, but he didn't want to talk about it in front of this….Timothy character.

Timothy opened his mouth, a smirk still dominating it, but before a word could be spoken, a phone started ringing. Reid searched through his pockets, checking the caller I.D. Tilting his head as he recognized the PD's number, he answered quickly.

"Hello?"

"Spencer? It's me, Sam. I need to talk to you about something."

A moment later, Reid's eyes flashed back to the doorway, a horror filled shock taking over his features. Timothy was gone. And so was their unsub.

…

_**Ok, well, things are going to be moving faster now. I know its not that long, and there is still a bit of explaining to do….But don't worry! All shall be explained in due time. Anyone see this coming? I know I didn't try too hard to hide it…haha. **_

_**Well, hope you guys liked it. Please review. No promises on the next chapter, seeing as I have A LOT of school work to get done in the next month…. But I WILL try!**_


	8. Chapter 8

_I owns nothing._

"Spencer? Spencer, are you there!" The world was slowly spiraling, and suddenly everything made sense. Of course, why hadn't he thought of that sooner?

….

_**A 8 year old Reid scanned his eyes over the pages quickly, a smile spreading on his face as he took in more knowledge. He never did understand why most kids hated reading. It was an escape, and each book was like an adventure without the dangers.**_

"_**Spency~ Let's go play!" Spencer look up, his smile fading slightly. Timothy waved him over, a pleading look on his face. He really didn't want to, but….Timothy was pretty much his only friend, and if he wanted him to play, he was supposed to, wasn't he? Isn't that how it worked?**_

"_**Ok, Timmy. But I have to finish the book and return it to the library before I go home…" Little Timmy looked at the book, taking note that it was only half read. **_

_**Frowning, he said "It's okay, why don't you finish it now? I have a book I want to read too…." Reid tilted his head, but soon nodded, a bit of energy seeping into his system once again. **_

_**He picked up his book and started reading again, getting lost in the history of Latin America. He glanced at Timothy out of the corner of his eye and noticed him trying to read at a fast pace. It clearly wasn't working out well, and Reid had to bite back a laugh. Why would anyone want to read that fast?**_

_**Oh wait, he did…**_

…_**.**_

_**Spencer called his home phone number, but neither of his parents picked up. His dad was away at "work" most likely, and his mom….Well, she didn't really need to be explained.**_

_**After calling a few more times to be sure, Reid hung up and started the trek home. It was safer to walk the streets then it was to take the bus. At least for him.**_

_**The bus just meant more teasing, bullying, and the occasional family bashing…. And that was only the tip of the ice burg. You know, the part that sticks out of the water, when really there is a whole mountain underneath it?**_

_**The was home typically took around 23 minutes and 48 seconds, but Reid felt like walking exceptionally slowly today. He didn't have a reason why; many would say he didn't like his family, that he didn't want to see them, but that was wrong.**_

**_Sure, he wasn't the biggest fan of what his father did, but he was still his dad. And maybe his mom had major issues, she was his _mother! _She gave birth to him for goodness sakes!_**

_**No, he had no reason to go slow. He just wanted a calming walk by himself. Maybe an 8 year old shouldn't be walking the street that long by himself, but he was different. He had enough knowledge and to avoid any dangers. Or so he thought.**_

…

_**After walking for a good 15 minutes, Spencer came across an abandoned park. It seemed to be in good shape, and the idea seemed too good to pass up. A park in good shape, with no one around to make fun of him? Perfect.**_

_**He walked over and sat on a swing, using his legs to walk backwards. Going as far back as he could, he let his legs up and the swing slid, propelling him forward. He kicked his legs, progressively getting higher and higher. **_

_**He felt a laugh start to bubbled forth, and it felt so good to let it out. A moment later, something was on his sides and he was simply watching the swing rock and shake by itself. **_

_**A scream tor itself from his lips as he realized he hadn't simply fallen, he had been grabbed. He squirmed, turning his head to look at his kidnapper. More dread filled him when all he saw was a white mask. Swallowing, he tried screaming louder, but it was futile. There was no one around.**_

_**A piece of cloth covered his mouth, and the world started to fade as he accidentally breathed it in.**_

"_**M-Mom…."**_

_**All faded to black.**_

…

**1st, keep in mind that Reid's dad left when he was 10, hence why he is still present at this time. **

**Ok, so….what did you think? Most of the next few chapters are going to be flashback continuations of this story, and then we still have to deal with the dang Unsub…. SO we still got some adventure ahead of us (laughs evilly) **

**Sooo, part of the reason I took a lil longer then I hoped was because of reviews. I got less then normal, and it took longer to get them. But I figured, who cares that much, right? I like the story, and I wanted to right it, so I am haha. The reviews are just icing on the cake that let me know it was worth the time to bake it…**

**So anyway, I thank all readers, reviewers, and alerters. THANKS! **


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